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Category Archives: Advice


Information Is Always Useful

Today I thought that we might take a look at a couple of useful, informative videos about canes.

A nice light caning technique – Ramping Up

This is not the kind of caning that I usually like to receive, but I do have my soft days and a lot of people prefer the play rather than severe pain. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. This video has a nice, pleasant light caning technique.

Variety of canes

Canes come in a lot of variable lengths, sizes and flexibilities. This video explores a few of the types available.

I hope you all found those useful



This Is A Subject That Floats My Boat

I do like the authoritarian atmosphere, that seems to radiate from a woman in uniform. It really clicks my “Yes M’s” button. And uniforms can be very flattering to the female form.

I have to confess to having a little personal problem about this, though. I try to keep a very strict separation between my play life and everyday life, but this self-discipline can be challenging to keep to sometimes, as women in authority, in real life, wearing uniforms, can make me slip up. A train guard gave me a simple instruction once and without thinking about it, I replied “Yes Ma’am, at your command”. I don’t think that she noticed and just seemed to be content that someone was doing what she asked them to, without giving her any jip. But I still feel incredibly embarrassed about this memory, to this day.

Even when I see play scenes with uniformed women on the receiving end of a spanking, my mind kind of turns things around and just sees this as a training session for when they are the uniformed disciplinarian.

It is a subject that holds a wide range of potential for posts, with modern uniforms, historical uniforms, military and civilian uniforms fitting into this category. Even, perhaps, illustrating some historical recollections of uniformed corporal punishment.

But I have to ruminate if doing this might increase my slip ups in real life

So I thought that I would ask the opinion of the visitors here as to whether or not I should start doing this, semi regularly, as a posting series?

Do you think that this is a good Idea or not?



Advice Welcome

I have and still do own lots of pervertables that double as paddles of sorts, bath brushes, rulers, hairbrushes and other things. Including my latest pervertable, that you can see in…


But I have never owned an implement that looks like a dedicated spanking paddle. And I do like to make my own toys on occasion. It does seem that a dedicated spanking paddle would be within my capabilities to manufacture. At this stage, it is worth pondering the alternatives, before committing to spending the time and money on getting to the end result. So I thought it would be nice if I could get some advice from those of you that have more experience of dedicated spanking paddles, than I do. Here are my questions.

1/ What type of wood is best for a spanking paddle?

2/ Should I start with a smaller, less ambitious paddle, before making a big one?

3/ If I go for a large one, what dimensions (length, width, thickness) are best?

4/ Would you recommend one with holes in or not?

5/ Is a More Oriental style paddle a good idea?

6/ Is there anything else, that I should take into consideration, that I have not thought about?

Any thoughts, knowledge, insights, recommendations or experiences are welcome. At the start of a build project, like this, experience of paddles owned, been on the receiving/giving end of, or even built yourself, are very welcome and could save me from mistakes and tears of frustration. Tears from the paddling, instead would be the ideal outcome 🙂




I wanted to start a series of posts on this, but have found that it takes a lot of research time, that I do not really have, and leaves you with very little material to post. So I will try to do this from time to time, focusing on one country at a time. But don’t expect these posts to appear that often.

Is Spanking Play Between Consenting Adults Legal In The UK?

When I lived in the UK

When I lived in the UK (I left in 1992), that question did not really have any relevance, as you would not be prosecuted under the law, for consensual spanking, but it was registered as a sectionable activity under The Mental Health Act. This meant that you could be detained, against your will, for mental medical treatment, for however long the authorities thought that it would take them to “cure You” of your mental condition. Luckily, consensual spanking between adults has since been removed from the list of sectionable conditions. If you want to see what the UK Mental Health Act includes today, click on the link below.


What then?

After that it did become illegal, under two existing laws, Assault and Actual Bodily Harm. And consenting to be the one on the receiving end made the submissive party an accessory to the assailant and therefore also a criminal. The news article below, written in 2018 illustrates what the law, up until then, regarded as illegal.


And Then?

Another law was passed, banning the making of several types of pornographic material in the UK, spanking among them. And then, some of the gallant producers, in the UK, protested against this. This lead to a relaxation of how the laws would be applied, as in the Criminal Prosecution Service was guided not to persecute spanking sites unless it involved activities that would lead to permanent or long term scaring. Consequently, this also applied to couples or groups, playing for their own pleasure.

So is consensual spanking between adults legal in the UK?

Technically no. But as long as scaring does not result from the play, you will not be prosecuted for doing it, under the law, effectively decriminalizing consensual adult spanking play in the UK. Unless you take it too far and leave scars. The link below tells you about the new guidelines that came into action.




A Study Of Poetry In Motion

Red, Of Consensual Spanking, posted some GIFs a little while ago and I have to admit that I have been a bit obsessed by them, ever since I saw them. “Why?” I hear you cry. Because they illustrated one of the best strapping techniques, that I have ever seen. So I thought it would be good to have a look at them here. Red has announced that he will be ending regular posting, you might consider popping over to his blog to wish him farewell.


The strapping

This first GIF illustrates the excellent use of the arms. At the top of the arc, the left hand is used to hold the strap in an ideal start position. The upper right arm has an arc towards the recipient, whilst the lower right arm extenuates the arc of the swing, giving it some Umph, for want of a better word, and finally the wrist is in motion producing that final stinging flick to the ensemble. Notice through the whole swing, the spanker does not take her eyes off the target.

In this second GIF, we can see how she is “Putting her back into it”. Well, not just her back, but her torso, hips and legs, creating a whole body motion, aiding her arms in delivering a sturdy impact of the strap.

As all of us, who have ever been on the receiving end of anything leather and flexible, know, most of the pain is in the last inch or two of the implement and not along the entire length of the implement’s strike area. Thus necessitating the spreading of the place where the end of the implement lands, across the whole area of the bottom, during several licks of the leather, to avoid lop-spanking, with all the pain being delivered to a small area of one buttock. It is hard to tell from a GIF but looking at the marking, on the spankee’s bottom, it looks like this spanker has spread the impacts to create the desired effect.


If you are new to Topping or Doming, I recommend that you study this delivery and see if you can get a similar result on the back of your sofa, before applying leather to real flesh.

For those experienced at handing out some licks of leather, how does this compare to your technique? Can you add anything to improve on what you see here?



This Is The Cage I Have Now

I have had this little beasty, for more time than I would care to remember. When I got it, it was a pricey, high-end model. You can pick up ones like this pretty cheap now. Although it is still a good, sturdy piece of kit that does the job well. I am not into chastity and denial and except for one occasion, have never worn this for more than a few hours. But in the past it has helped me get play dates with fellow amateurs, which might not have happened otherwise. Having met a potential playmate only a few times, often they can feel a bit nervous about going somewhere private with someone they do not know well enough to trust yet. Throwing this into the mix and the other party knowing that I am rendered harmless to them, indeed reliant on them, to release me has been a deal maker.

So What Is The Problem?

A small problem, is that the pins marked A, in the photo, fit into the sockets marked B. These can be very painful skin pinchers and are difficult to line up. The big problem, though, is that the ring, C, is fixed. I am pretty average in the porcelain pointer department, but my two veg are a little larger than normal. The fixed ring, on this, is 50 mm and is the largest available for this model. It has always been a struggle getting it on, but trying it recently, after not using this for some years, It was somewhat painful to get things to fit (I am sure they are getting bigger, as I age) and it is not hard to imagine that this might be a problem in a pressure on situation. The good feature, that I would like to keep the same, is the small padlock, marked D. These are easily available and some women like to bring their own, to make sure that I do not have a spare key.

The Solutions

I want to get a model with a hinged ring, similar to the ones above, but with no pins and sockets.

This Is The One That I Am Considering

A shop, not too far away from me, is selling this model. It has a hinged ring, no pins and sockets and is considerable lighter, than the one I have now. The weight of my current cage can be an issue, after a couple of hours. I really like the way that this looks, too.

I have only ever owned one Cock Cage, in my life. So if anyone with more experience than me has an opinion on the model above, or recommendations for something else, I would gladly like to hear what you have to say.

All advice welcome