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Category Archives: confessions


I decided to participate in March questions month and here are the answers that I have given. The questions are ranked in chronological order from the first asked to the last

morningstar Asked

I know you go to pro dommes (I’m right aren’t I?)
Do you find spankings arouse you? and if they do……. is it difficult considering the spanking isn’t with a primary partner?

You are right morningstar I do employ the skills of pro Dommes and Disciplinarians, including those of the lady in the photograph above. Fantasizing about spankings arouses me but actually being spanked has the opposite effect and I find that I would much rather enjoy the spanking and the high that it gives me, than participate in “Adult happy Time”. I have participated in sexual activities in play situations in the past but this was to satisfy the desires of the other party involved and not for my gratification. I also play with fellow amateur enthusiasts but I will not be likely to write about those encounters on this blog

Naughty Nora Asked

Hmmmm….well, as you have probably gathered, my particular kink is spanking as discipline. Could you share with your readers about a memorable time you were spanked for being naughty? Or, if that doesn’t apply….perhaps you could share about your most memorable spanking?

Nora I play for fun and the high that I get from playing. BUT I have always aspired to be a stoic spankee and I do not always achieve that, being a bit of a dancer and flincher when taking some. When I cannot control myself whilst playing, I feel better if I am punished for that at the time rather than beating myself up mentally about it for weeks afterwards. Once some time ago I was being caned and repeatedly blocked with my left hand. I requested that I be dealt with for this offence but the person I was playing with was reluctant to be more harsh as we were already playing very hard. She told me to sit on the table, that I had been bending over and then gave me six hard cane strokes on the front of my thighs. I did not like this, neither psychologically nor the type of pain it caused. The threat of it happening again proved to be an effective deterrent and I kept my ordered positions for the rest of the play session.

Fondles asked

Would you name 3 implements that are employed regularly (or have been in the past) besides the hand, on your behind (or your spankee’s behind) and rank them in order of preference pls

Number 3 – Belt

Number 2 – Flogger

Number 1 – Cane

morningstar Asked Again

I am curious how you came to live where you do? I know your parents are in Britain…

My parents are now both deceased but did live in the UK. I found work with an organization that operates internationally. First they sent me to The Netherlands and then they sent me to Belgium. Then they wanted to send me back to the UK and I did not want to go back there and so left that organization and found work here in Belgium and decided to settle here permanently

KDPierre Asked

In what capacity do you use your botanical skills? Vegetable yields? Garden design? Something else? As a gardener with small ponds, I’m curious.


Also……….what is your opinion of Affligem Tripel?

I am afraid that I have not tried that beer yet. There are so many to get through in Belgium but I will give it a go next time that I see it

By qualification, I am an Amenity Horticulturist specializing in the use of plants and other ornamental green stuff in areas to be used by people. I have designed and created maintenance plans, am a trained and experienced adult instructor and my personal specialities are in topiary and herbaceous perennials although I am skilled in many other aspects of ornamental and utilitarian horticulture. Having said that I currently and for some years now, only working as a professional gardener, due to having less than perfect written Dutch and my own desires to keep my hands in the earth and avoid a desk job

Roz Asked

As I understand it (please correct me if I am wrong), you have experienced being both spanker and spankee. Which is your preference?


Where in the world would you like visit (when that becomes an option again)?

The next place to tick off is a trip to the Rhine Gorge but I think that I would throw that over right now, for a chance to have a tour of the UK to see some of my family, none of whom I have seen since Christmas 2019

I am by nature a spankee but have and am still prepared to switch if the occasion arises. Although I never seek to Top, I am happy to help someone else get to their happy place and I believe that experience on the receiving end helps develop the skills to achieve that

MJ Asked

How about just letting your readers know just a little more about you. I know you are British, but that’s it.

I am afraid that I am not going to answer that one MJ, for the same reason that I do not have an email address on my blog. Some time ago, when this blog got a lot more traffic than it does now, I attracted the attentions of some far right groups in Belgium, who were not happy about my internet activities here. All of the blogs and other internet media that I knew about are gone now, due to anti terrorism laws but with more private platforms available, for example WhatsApp, I cannot be sure that they are not still having bad thoughts towards me and so am not going to hand them, on a plate, my identity. Honestly I think that 999 out of a thousand of these people are just piss and wind but it only takes that one in a thousand nut job to do you harm

I hope that you all enjoyed that. I think that if I do this again next year I will split the answers into two or more posts but it was an interesting project to take part in



Or About Pegging To Be More Precise

A post on another blog got me thinking about this. The author, Fondles, informed us about a little anal training that she has been doing, in preparation for some Butt Stuff fun that she is planning. You can read about it via….


I have not been pegged in over a decade but reading this post brought back some fond memories. I have never asked nor will I ever ask to be pegged but I am happy to accommodate a play partner that wishes to take part in some girl in boy fun, if they are prepared to be sensible about it

Don’t turn up wearing something like this

Unless you want to hear me screaming SAFEWORD!!! Repeatedly. I prefer something of more sensible proportions. Something similar to the size of my own appendage seems fair

That’s more like it

What I Like About Pegging

I think that the best thing about letting a woman penetrate you, is that it is me that is giving her the permission to do so. Which is not only a nice change but represents a high level of submission in my mind. Far more than being spanked, which is a lot more fun but does not have that same level of offering trust of subjugation to someone that letting them fulfil their desire to penetrate you does. And that is why I will only take part in pegging when I am asked to, by the other individual involved, as it is my submitting to their desire that clicks the right buttons in my head.


This is fine

If it is the kind of thing that the woman involved wants. I am happy to go along with this

But this is my favourite position

I like to feel the weight of her body on me and her skin against my skin as I feel her moving against my body. Her hot laboured breath on my shoulders and the noise of her efforts close to my ear. It just makes the experience so more personal, especially if she manages to orgasm from the psychology of the event or with a little mechanical help. It makes me feel like I have served to satisfy

I wonder if something like this could be used?

Or would it be too difficult for her to retain during the act. I have only experienced a butterfly vibrator being used under the pelvic harness but that worked well 🙂

What I Don’t Like about being pegged

Two things. Firstly doing a deep colonic cleanse, I have always found this difficult and it can take me hours to get every thing squeaky clean, sometimes. Secondly having an uncomfortable lump of man-made dildo shoved up where the sun does not shine, although it helps if she is a little rough and makes things a bit painful for me, without causing any damage back there. But I think that it is the second one of these that makes doing this such a significant act of submission for me.

Giving Selfless Gratification To Someone

I have never orgasmed from being pegged and have always refused any offered help to achieve that end, either before or after the event. Although if the female involved reached her high from the event, that makes it perfect for me. Spanking is a lot of fun but it is mostly about the chemical high that it can achieve in my body and mind. Pegging is about achieving the psychological high of getting someone else to the place they want to be whilst giving totally of myself without expecting reward. It is my ultimate act of submissiveness. And that is why I will never be the one asking to do this or have it part of a pay to play.



In this interview, American Comedian tells us how her mother found out that she liked to be spanked and about her ex boyfriend who was very fond of her feet

Sarah Silverman Talks About The Kinky Side Of Her Life

There is evidence that she likes bear bottom spankings 🙂



Longing For The Sweet Harsh Kiss Of The Open Hand

It must be nearly two years now since I last presented my bare buttocks for a hand spanking

For me it did not use to represent the high point of spanking play but absence has made the heart grow fonder

Now I long for the heat of thighs beneath me, the feeling of muscles in motion as the hand is brought crashing down upon tender flesh, over and over in a heavenly nightmare of rapidly repeated impacts, exploding in wonderful pain

To be honest with you I long for the physical, skin to skin touch of any human being right now, pain play related or just normal vanilla contact. But at the top of my list of desires for the human touch, the magnificent submission of being over a woman’s knee and hearing palm striking bottom, holds a high summit

Back in February of this year, I arranged to go for a coffee with a friend in a nearby town. When we met we shook hands. That was the last time that I had physical, skin to skin contact with another human being. Eight months ago

Now I long for skin to skin contact in it’s most gloriously extreme form as someone drives their hand so hard into a buttock, it is as if they are trying to create enough heat to weld the two together

I was lucky enough to get a successful play date back in June, which considering my circumstances combined with the difficulties of the pandemic, leaves me feeling very happy that I had the opportunity to enjoy that this year. But by mutual agreement both of us decided to keep as much distance as is humanly possible whilst in a spanking play situation. We did this with the use of a belt two floggers and a cane. But I have to admit that the interaction lacked somewhat, from not being able to get close up and personal. O! I want a hand spanking so much right now

I guess that the old saying is true “You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone”

Let’s hope that this all ends soon and we can all get back to some sort of normality



Pencil Skirts That Is

There is just something so complimentary to the female form, about the way that these hip, thigh and bottom hugging garments fit to the wearer

Like most males that like to bend over and take some punishment, I do have sexual fantasies about spanking scenarios. And in these imagined interactions I very often find the spanker is wearing a pencil skirt.

But when actually playing, like most male bottoms and subs, I find that sexual activity is not something that I want at that time. Most find, as I do, that spanking makes any trouser excitement go away or not appear in the first place.

But even when sex is not in the mix, pencil skirts are an attire that exudes authority and control. They are just so neat and tidy and no nonsense.

So if imagining a sexy interaction with a fantasy Top.

Or actually bending over and receiving my just desserts in real life.

Pencil skirts always seem appropriate 🙂

I wonder who first designed this wonderful garment?



I would like to start by saying that I am not into transvestism or transsexualism in any way and I have got nothing against anyone who finds that either of those labels applies to them. But, in the little fantasy world inside my mind, I do often find my self wishing I was of the female persuasion, just for spanking play. It just seems to me that women have it better, as submissives.

Women Have Nicer Bottoms

At some point in most spanking play the undercrackers come down and it is time for the big reveal. But even in my younger and skinnier days I could not have shown someone a sight as glorious as that in the image above. Even guys who spend half their lives at the gym and are sporting buns of steel seldom look so physically artistic. It is just a fact that the female posterior has a greater potential to be hot hot hot.

It’s Easier For Women To Find Play Partners

I’m not saying that it is always easy for a submissive female to find the right play partner but any woman who is looking for a spanking will not find herself short of offers. In the F/m world you find far too many little m’s chasing after far too few big F’s. It’s just the way it is.

Women Are More Flexible Than Men

Or at least they are in their younger guises. I doubt that I could have ever sustained a pose like the one above for the length of time it takes to get a proper whooping. And I was physically pretty flexible for a guy, in my younger days.

Women Look Better In Clothes

Especially uniforms. The male shape is just not a right for things to fit where they should. No matter how careful I am putting a spanking play outfit together I know that it is never going to look as good on me as the equivalent outfit would look on a woman.

Women Won’t Get Labelled For Same Sex Play

A woman can be straight, lesbian or bisexual but no one would automatically conclude that she was any of these just because she was involved in spanking or being spanked by another woman. I do not usually involve sex as part of my spanking play and so have no problems with being spanked by a man, except that some people might label me as gay for doing so. I have nothing against the gay community in the same way as I have nothing against anyone from Spain but I do not want to have anyone presume that I am gay or Spanish, simply because I am neither of these.

I suspect that I am not the only male submissive who is a little jealous of our female counterparts. But perhaps it is just as the parody of the song sung by Petula Clark says

The other subs ass is always redder

That paddle hurts better from the other side

Oh the other subs ass is always redder

Some are lucky, some are not

You’ve gotta be thankful for what you got

Some of the images used in this post came from the blogs linked below